Universities to save $5 billion by cutting diversity departments

CANBERRA, ACT – Universities facing a crisis $16 billion shortfall over the next 3-years have found a way to cover up to $5 billion by axing their ‘Equality, Diversity, and Inclusion’ Departments.

Over the last decade there has been a sharp rise in university funding for staff and resources focused on bringing ‘diversity’ among the students and faculty.  These departments have enabled universities to closely monitor student’s personal speech, create safe spaces only available for minority races and sexualities, enforce transgender quotas into debating teams, and recruit and train speciality squads of campus ‘diversity police’.

Unfortunately, due to the drop in enrolments from international students with the COVID19 travel bans, universities have been left with little choice but to find savings in a number of areas. Due to the significant size and costs associated with ‘Equality, Diversity, and Inclusion’ Departments it has been slated as one of the main cost-cutting measures.

There has however been an outcry from Chief Diversity Officers regarding the cuts, claiming that a focus on diversity is vital for ensuring public universities are able to enforce a monoculture of ideas around pro-choice, gender identity and Marxism.

“Who is going to protect Universities from the climate questioning Peter Ridd, the China critiquing Drew Pavlov, or the rabid Evangelicals?” a representative from the union exclaimed.

“Diversity in universities is key for making sure that different ideas are kept in check.”

It is further reported that the universities may have to make deeper cuts by dropping subjects such as Feminist Astrology, Queer Performativity at Urban Dog Parks, and the Cultural Appropriation of Racism in Volleyball.

Sign up to the Damascus Dropbear for more higher education news. For more discussion around universities and intellectual diversity, see this article by the Gospel Coalition.

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