Pentecostal University students barricade themselves inside chapel ‘until Holy Spirit released’
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Sports theologians volley over sinlessness of Wimbledon winner Ash Barty
SYDNEY, NSW – A significant battle has erupted between theologians as to whether Australian tennis Wimbledon champion, Ash Barty, is in fact a ‘sinless sports star’.
After Barty’s historic win on Saturday, Australians were generally shocked to have a sports star who appeared ‘beyond reproach’.
Dr Bird Michaels from Ridley College, indicated that Barty’s achievements may have deeper theological significance.
“No chair throwing, no media meltdowns, no racket smashing – what we potentially have here is an Australian sinless sports star.”
“It is what we have long hoped for – a perfect icon that reveals God’s ultimate plan for what sport should be.”
“I don’t want to jump too quickly to conclusions, but there do appear to be a number of prophecies that Barty seems to fulfil.”
“It was foretold the sporting saviour would be born in Ipswich, would come from the tribe of Goolagong, and would spend a season in cricket.”
However, Professor Thomas Markson, from More University College, indicated that such a status would be impossible.
“Put simply there is no righteous sports star, not even one.”
“Now, I’m happy to admit that Barty may well be on the path to a Margaret Courtesqe style-sainthood.”
“But she is not the Messiah – just a good, moral tennis player who can teach us how to play in the Spirit.”
It is further reported that a group of executives from Tennis Australia are increasingly concerned about Barty and suggestions that she may be performing miraculous backhands on the Sabbath.
It is also rumoured that Barty has told her followers she will destroy the Rod Laver arena and rebuild it in three days.
Sign up to the Damascus Dropbear to for more tennis news. For more discussion around sport and theology, see this piece by the Gospel Coalition.
