Pentecostal University students barricade themselves inside chapel ‘until Holy Spirit released’
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Rumours abound that Saint Perrottet can forgive the sin of unvaccination
MARTIN PLACE – Speculation has emerged over claims that the new NSW Premier, Saint Dominic Perrottet, may actually have the power to forgive the sin of unvaccination.
In a press conference today, Perrottet expressed, through cryptic parables, that he may be the One to redeem the unvaxed from eternal lockdowns.
“Which is easier: to say ‘Your unvaccinations are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Get up, take your job and walk out of lockdown’?”
“I want you to know that the Son of NSW has authority on earth to forgive the unvaxxed.”
A great number of journalists, however, questioned Perrottet’s authority to forgive the outcasts.
“Who does he think he is, honestly?” said Davine Kosch of the morning show Sunshine.
“Who can forgive unvaccinations but the health experts alone, who he didn’t even have represented at his press conference!”
“Segregation on health grounds is vital, and anti-vax peasants have clearly surrendered any rights to societal privileges.”
Curious followers are now waiting eagerly to see whether Saint Perrottet is likely to provide eternal forgiveness for the unvaccinated much sooner than December the 1st.
However, some theologians are fiercely debating whether this unvax forgiveness is due to their own works, or simply by the unearned grace given by the Premier.
Sign up to the Damascus Dropbear for more vaccination news. To read Jesus actual story of healing the unvaccinated equivalent, see this piece by the Gospel Coalition.
