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Bluey’s dad arrested for secret Nazi membership
BRISBANE, QLD – Beloved children’s animated character, Bandit Heeler, was arrested today after police discovered Nazi party paraphernalia at his Brisbane residence.
Authorities also search the home computer files, and allegedly found links to Neo-nazi discussion forums in which Mr Heeler was actively involved.
The arrest comes after a recent undercover journalistic investigation by the ABC in which they identified numerous racist comments in ‘Bluey’ episodes, including the obscene phrase ‘ooga booga’.
The findings prompted an inquiry of the popular program, where detectives were surprised to decode numerous embedded messages placed within Bluey episodes which appear to have been communicating to a worldwide white supremacist network.
“I am just relieved that the discovery of Bandit’s truly awful views were made sooner rather than later, before he could brainwash a whole generation of youth with his repugnant racism,” said ABC spokesperson and Mediawatch host, Paul Barry.
It is further reported that the award-winning show was stripped of its International Emmy, with new partner Disney cutting ties with the show.
ABC has issued an unreserved and grovelling apology, and has commissioned a ‘harm and offence inquisition’ of all other ABC kids programs.
“Fundamentally we all need to be highly suspicious of each other, as well as wholesome cartoons, and should ensure we interpret all of life through the lens of intersectional offence.” Mr Barry said.
“This just goes to show that even if you are the best dad in the world, deep down you are probably still a racist Nazi dog.”
Sign up to the Damascus Dropbear for more entertainment updates. For some thoughtful discussion around racism and Christianity, see this piece by the Jubilee Centre.
