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Bezos now seeking to be first rich man to ride camel through eye of a needle
WASHINGTON, USA – The world’s richest man, Jeff Bezos, has set his sights on the unusual new goal of passing a camel through the eye of a needle.
Fresh from his first sub-orbital space flight, it seems Bezos has no intention of slowing down in attempting to achieve the impossible.
“Many years ago, Jesus Christ laid down an ancient challenge of putting a camel through the eye of a needle was thrown down,” Bezos declared in a crowded press conference.
“With it, an eternal treasure was offered to whoever could do it.”
“Ever since that moment, rich men throughout the ages have been longing and attempting to complete that feat,”
“As the richest man on this earth and beyond, I intend to conquer the kingdom of heaven just like I conquered the kingdom of space.”
Journalists then queried Bezos as to whether he really understood what Jesus was talking about in the Matthew 19:23-24 verse, and how he planned to fit the camel through the needle anyway.
“I can answer both those questions in one shot – with enough money one can do anything.”
“For those with billionaire ears to hear, Jesus was clearly indicating that whoever sells the most possessions will be perfect.”
“My Amazon company has clearly sold more possessions than anyone in history.”
“As for the camel, our plan is spend a trillion dollars developing a super elastic needle that can be stretched so wide that the camel and my giant head can squeeze through.”
It is further reported that fellow billionaire Elon Musk is also working on the feat by attempting to invent a shrink ray where he can ride right-through, while Richard Branson is attempting to build the world’s largest needle which he and the camel can then be shot at out of a cannon.
Sign up to the Damascus Dropbear for more billionaire updates. To read more discussion around the rich young ruler and camel parable, see this piece by the Gospel Coalition.
