Three more players banned from South African cricket team after refusing to kneel

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DUBAI, BABYLON – Three more players from the South African cricket team have been dismissed after indicating that they would not kneel before the remaining World Cup games.

The players, opening batsman, Shad Rach, fine leg, Mes Shach, and fast bowler Abed Nego, all indicated that they would refuse the decree to ‘bend the knee‘.

The move comes amidst the expulsion the previous day of world-class wicket keeper, Quinton De Kock, for the same defiant act.

Damascus Dropbear interviewed the players to get their perspective.

“Look, we do not need to defend ourselves before Cricket South Africa and the Chairman Lawson Nebuchadnezzar,” Batsman Rach exclaimed.

“We are far from racist, but we simply cannot in good conscience worship the golden #BLM statue they have set up.”

“We have faith that our God we will deliver us from this current controversy.”

“But if not, we will still never bend the knee – except of course if attempting a sweep shot….”

At this point the interview was interrupted, with the players arrested and led towards a makeshift fiery furnace (not difficult to create in the searing Dubai heat).

The players were then thrown in by #BLM activists, all chanting “Hey Ho, Hey Ho, these heretical cricketers have to go”.

Reports are coming in, however, of witnesses who are observing the cricketers walking around in the furnace – unbound, unharmed, and seemingly hitting a ball to each other.

A fourth man, looking like a son of the gods, was also observed playing, but didn’t seem to be very good at catching due to the holes in his hands.

Sign up to the Damascus Dropbear for more sporting news. You can read the biblical story in Daniel 3, and hear from Christians who chose not to take the #BLM knee in Christian Concern.



The Damascus Dropbear exists to develop satirical news which helps people laugh, then think, about theology, culture, church and politics from a biblical worldview. Our mission is to help others to engage with the Bible, explore questions around religion, and ultimately see Christian principles and ethics inform our society. If you would like to support our project click here.

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