Shock as Melbourne police repent and join in illegal worship service

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FOUNTAIN GATE, VIC – A surprise twist has occurred in the Victoria COVID lockdown after Melbourne police intending to shut down an illegal worship ended up participating instead.

On Sunday, police had planned to storm an unauthorised outdoor worship service of the Revival Christian Church near Fountain Gate after declaring they had breached the lockdown restrictions.

However, worshippers were shocked after the group of charging police suddenly dropped to their knees in repentance.

One church member described the scene:

“There were about 10 of them all coming at us with batons, but we just closed our eyes and kept on right on singing.”

“Before I knew it I could hear this deep voice start to sing as well.”

“I looked over my shoulder and there was this 6ft 4 bearded Sergeant right next to me with tears streaming down his face singing Amazing Grace at full volume.” 

“He wasn’t that good a singer I must say, but his face was shining just like the Apostle Paul’s on the Road to Damascus.”

Witness reports indicate that the entire squad of police stayed with the worshippers, also joining them for the sermon, as well as prayer and repentance.

One of the officers, Constable Jane Gilmore, talked with Damascus Dropbear after the service when the group had dispersed.

“I don’t know how to describe what happened exactly, but when we heard that 90’s worship music played over cheap portable speakers we all just knew we had cry out in praise.”

“After that I spent a good hour just praying, before going around cuddling the congregants and begging their forgiveness for trying to shut it down.”

“I tell you though, I’m not looking forward to our dressing down at the station today as I bet the Inspector is going to be pretty pissed at us.”

It is further reported that almost the entire police squad involved have declared that they have now become believers, and are now unsure as to whether they can continue administrating violent crackdowns within the Victorian police.

Victorian Premier Daniel Andrews has issued a strong rebuke of the lack of enforcement, threatening all newly Christian officers with expulsion if they cannot uphold his law.

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