Queen Anastasia decrees full love and devotion from Queenslanders – exiles unfaithful from hospitality venues
BRISBANE, QLD – Queen and State Premier, Anastasia Palaszczuk, has announced a new decree that requires all Queenslanders to exhibit unquestionable love towards her and her reign in order to enjoy basic freedoms.
The declaration follows the new laws made by the Queensland Government regarding mandates which remove the unwashed and unvaccinated access to public venues.
The Damascus Dropbear had the opportunity to interview Queen Anastasia earlier in the week, who somewhat surprisingly indicated her inspiration had come from biblical sources.
“t I actually was consulting the Bible in regard to this decision, and was particularly inspired by the story of Jezebel.” Queen Anastasia regaled.
“Essentially Jezebel ran the line that if people didn’t do exactly what she said, then a Queen can easily strip citizens of all rights and privileges – demonstrated in the Naboth vineyard situation from 1 Kings 21.“
“So as a fair and just Queen, I now invite all Queenslanders to come and sit at my table – except the unvaccinated.”
“Noting that this is not primarily because they pose a health risk, but rather due to their deep and unforgivable unfaithfulness towards me.”
“If they are hungry, let them eat cake.”
The Queen(slander) was then questioned over when life might return to normal again.
“That is the wrong question. The better one is – how can I make the queen happy and more powerful?”, Queen Anastasia answered with impatience.
“And I give them a new command: Trust in the premier with all your heart and lean not on your own conscience; in all your ways submit to her, and she will have mercy on you.”
It is further reported that Queen Anastasia has not ruled out stonings for those who refuse vaccinated fidelity by the 17th of December.
Sign up to the Damascus Dropbear for more royal decree updates. To read more about the story of Jezebel, see this piece by Bible Study Tools.