National curriculum to incorporate ‘Islamic Karl Marx’ as Father of Australia

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SYDNEY, NSW – A revised national curriculum would give greater weight to the role that Karl Marx and Islam played in Australia’s historical development.

The Australian Curriculum Assessment and Reporting Authority (ACARA) chief executive, David de Carvalho, said that the review has found the existing curriculum did not include enough “truth telling” about pre- and post-European development.

“There is a real lack of historical understanding among our young people who are ignorant of the values that Australia was built upon,” Mr Carvalho explained.

“For too long the imbalance has been with discriminatory Judeo-Christian beliefs.”

“Therefore, as enlightened intellectuals, we decided to correct the ledger by focusing on teaching Australia’s great, but relatively unknown, Marxio-Islamic heritage.”

“The wonderous democratic freedoms we have today is heavily indebted to the combined teachings of Karl Marx and Islam, and with the National Curriculum review we can now ensure that every school child is forced to recognise that truth.”

Further study of the curriculum has revealed the inclusion of some fascinating and previously unexplored historical events that occured within Australia.

“Well, for example, in the year 8 history curriculum students will now study the wonderful story of the Father of Australia, Governor Karl Marx, who came with the first fleet.”

“Not many would be aware of his historic facilitation of a completely equitable and utopian treaty with the bourgeois-oppressed indigenous peoples.”

“Nor would they know the story of how Allah revealed to him the first gold nugget during his Ramadan fast, where he declared ‘the religion of Islam is the opulence of the masses’ as Australia’s motto.”

Several journalists have taken the Draft National Curriculum to task however, saying that it has completely failed to recognise the role that transgender environmental activists played in the convict emancipation movement.

Mr de Carvalho has however reminded them that it is only a draft and consultation is now open to the public, but did indicate he was already convinced of the need for this inclusion in the final version.

Sign up to the Damascus Dropbear for more education updates. For further discussion around the national curriculum, see this piece by Eternity News.

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