Eric Metaxas releases new book after protester scuffle

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WASHINGTON, DC – Author and popular radio host, Eric Metaxas, has released a new book outlining the need for Christians to militarise their response to the current civil unrest in the US.

The move comes after Metaxas was caught on camera punching a protester outside the Republican National Convention.

“We all know Jesus said we should ‘turn the other cheek’ to our enemies.”

“What most people don’t know is that this was actually a method of distraction so that the disciples could come up behind the enemy and sucker punch them” Metaxas explains in his book’s introduction.

“Plus, Jesus didn’t have to deal with the kind of straight-up jerks we are seeing today.”

There have been mixed reviews regarding the book, with some applauding the call to action and others expressing hesitance.

“It’s ’bout time them Christians realised that the only way to be ‘blessed as a peacemaker’ is to first blast them with a haymaker” – Roger Ryan (5/5 stars)

“Shame on him. Eric should know that the only truly pacifist Christian response to loving our enemies is to curl up into a ball until they get bored of kicking you.” – Henry van der Haven (0.2/5 stars)

It is further reported that Metaxas is encouraging churches to form into local militias, suggesting that the phrases ‘Bible bashing’, ‘Prayer warriors’ and ‘Lighting Holy Spirit fires’ should be taken in a more literal sense.

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