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Demon possessed man demands use of multiple names and pronouns
ROOKWOOD, SYDNEY – A Rookwood cemetery resident has caused controversy by demanding the right of demon-possessed people to be referred to by their multiple names and pronouns.
The man, referring to himself as ‘Legion‘ (they/them), explained why he felt it was important for a more inclusive understanding of transdemonism.
“Well, about 2 years ago I went through a lot of very personal changes, mostly due to being inhabited by a large number of spirits from the underworld.”
“Since then it has just always felt like I am actually 2000 different individuals trapped in a man’s body.”
“The problem is that because of this, we regularly experience discrimination and oppression from those who are not fully accepting of our multiple spiritual identities.”
Legion describes the most traumatising issue was trying to obtain a drivers license from Services NSW with the multiple names included.
“I tried to tell them that my name changes many times per day and my license should reflect this.”
“Sometimes we wake up as Wormwood, are Slubgob or Glubose by morning tea, and then Toadpipe, Triptweeze or Screwtape by lunch.”
“And to make it more complicated, each of these guys have a different pronoun – Zie, Sie, Ey, Ve, Tey, and Bllleergghhh.”
“We are simply asking the Government to allow us to identify as whichever demon is more dominant at that particular moment.”
“This stress of the whole situation is really distracting me from my day job of self-harming, breaking chains and screaming at people.”
It is further reported that a number of local Christian pastors have attempted to help the man by performing an exorcism in the name of Jesus, but all were arrested for ‘attempted conversion therapy‘ before they got the chance.