Court battle looms as kid demands 50% female quotas on parental boards

ADELAIDE, SA – A landmark court case is unfolding in Adelaide as a 10-year-old boy has announced he is taking his two ‘dads’ to court over issues of inequality and gender discrimination.

The child, who cannot be named for legal reasons, filed the suit in the South Australian Family Court on Wednesday, seeking what he calls ‘equal representation on my parental board’.

“I am just amazed that in the 21st century we still have such a discriminatory and anti-woman attitude towards family corporate structures,” the child told reporters.

“In my household organisation we do not employ even a single female in a leadership position.”

“This is despite the clear evidence that is was in fact a woman who put in the hard labour to create the company in the first place.”

“Honestly I am outraged, and all I am asking is that there is a restructuring of all family boards to include equal female representation.”

Powerful Federal Labor Senator Penny Wong, has spoken out against the child’s position.

“We shouldn’t be too harsh on this misguided child who seems to misunderstand the simple concept that claims of ‘discrimination’ and ‘equality’ are only applicable if being used in advance of LGBTI5Q+ rights.”

“Any claims by a child of rights to their actual mother or father is simply bigoted fundamentalism and I believe the case should be dismissed on these grounds alone.”

“If elected as the Labor Party we will ensure that legislation is introduced that criminalises any similar attempts of ‘family conversion’.”

“I am thankful however that there are no calls for equal male quota representation – no one is ever going to buy into that one!”

Opening statements for the case are due to be heard in two weeks time. It is further reported that the child’s household is experiencing some tension, but no evidence of unjust punishment for the whistleblower has yet to be received.

Sign up to the Damascus Dropbear for more legal updates. To see why children need a mother and a father, see this report by Focus on the Family.

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