Frugal white supremacist conflicted about Black Friday sales

Revival breaks out at Schoolies after punch spiked with sacramental wine

Theologically optimistic protestors march around parliament walls seven times in hopes vaccine mandates will fall

Media eager to provide balanced and non-rabid coverage of Religious Discrimination Bill debate

Australian Cricket captain Tim Paine puts The Ashes on his head in act of repentance

Premier Andrews announces plan to self-inject pandemic super powers over livestream

NSW propose euthanasia solution where elderly are ‘lovingly’ pushed out onto the ocean

Fat foetuses overjoyed as ‘Zoe’s Law’ grants human rights according to weight

Alan Jones denies being fired, rather that he was raised up in chariot beyond Sky

Leaders finally complete Climate Tower of Glasgow, sound even more confused

Australian sporting codes confirm you can now come out as gay, but not Christian

Even toughest atheist pours out tears of thanksgiving after little Cleo found alive and well