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Atheist still loses debate even after ‘cancelling’ Christian opponent
MELBOURNE, VIC – A debate on the existence of God ended in a surprising fashion yesterday as the Atheist proponent managed to lose even after he had first ‘cancelled’ his Christian opponent.
The debate, held at the University of Melbourne, was advertised as a ‘respectful and reasoned discussion on the metaphysical question of God’ and involved prominent atheist Dr Dawk Richards, and Mathematics Professor, Lennox Johnson.
However, the event was derailed beforehand after Dr Richards arranged for a group of angry students to block Professor Lennox’s car from its arrival, thereby ensuring he could not participate in the debate.
“Look, I’m all for being open to a range of arguments and diverse opinions in the deeper human search for truth,” explained Dr Richards.
“But not if those arguments are ones which I determine to cause harm, hatred, discrimination, offence, annoyance or in anyway challenge my way of thinking.”
“That simply crosses the line, and so that’s why I ensured to cancel the Professor and debate myself instead – which I think everyone would in fact find much more interesting anyway.”
Unexpectedly however, when Dr Richards finished his arguments, the judges unanimously determined that the empty podium had in fact won the day.
“It was quite odd, but we actually had to award Dr Richards minus points due to the ridiculous nature of his arguments.”
“His arguments that ‘something’ can come from ‘nothing’, that the beautiful complexity of the universe was just random, and that life came from a thick soup, was just completely unconvincing.”
“And the way he finished, by simply shouting ‘science’ over and over again, really gave us no choice to award it to the podium.”
In great irony however, Dr Richards was himself cancelled during the Q&A section of the meeting after he suggested that science and reason needed to be considered even in regard to sex and race.
At this the students angrily chased Dr Richards out of the room and down the street, returning only to announce themselves the final winners of the debate.